Crowds, Christmas, Crouching, Crying, How do you cope?

Ah.....Christmas Preview in our town....the smell of hot apple cider, the ringing of the bells, the hustle and bustle of the holiday season. Years before my son enjoyed this little holiday ritual. Look at the picture above for proof. There he stood watching the pretty Nutcracker Ballerina dancers in the window of the antique store, one of the traditions at our preview....people bumped him, stepped on his toes, walked in front of him and probably even spilled hot chocolate on his shoes. Not one tear. Just excitement at being downtown at night. With people. With Santa. With his family.
     Last night we ate an early gluten free casein free diner and set out to enjoy the festivities. Happy the rain had decided to hold off. We were all eager to hit our favorite shops. We even got a prime parking spot as soon as we arrived! All good signs for an evening that was sure to be filled with holiday grandeur. 
Walking through the first building we noticed a slight apprehension building in our son who was trying his best to hold it together.  To us the noise level was minimal. (To him it was a crescendo of shouts and rings and laughter evil in nature forced into his ears. He began to whimper.) We coaxed him along. Come on son, it will be okay....lets just get out side.
Finally out into the street. For us fresh air and wow, slow night, usually this preview has the streets packed with people rows deep. (For our son, massive amounts of people pushing and shoving against him touching him, loud and angry noises hitting his ears, and lights flashing against his eyes making it hard to see.)
Our daughter spotted a friend  dancing in the store front window and we stood talking with her father glad to re-unite with an old friend from grade school. He said his daughter was doing really well in her new school and asked how our daughter was doing in her new school....typical talk of the reunion....(Our son forced to stand in the busy street tried to shield himself from the noise and movement that was going on around him. He tried to understand why we had stopped. We had said we were going to the candy store. Now we were just standing there in the middle of the street! )
Finally I realized that he was melting down and asked dad to take him to the candy store, we would meet them there. After gathering said daughter and navigating through the crowd we arrived at the store of every child's dream. This candy store is amazing! Of course not durring Christmas Preview....waaaaaay too crowded....
Our son did not enjoy his time in his favorite store. I decided ear muffs were in order after he crouched down and grabbed his ears in frustration at the noise level. This was found and purchased at the next store in the form of an aviator hat. Very cool. Did it work? Not really. Why didn't we just go home? Well after about two more stores and three more melt downs we did. Funny thing is, on the way back to the car, when my son saw the comic book store, he wondered out loud if we could all go there. I said no. My nerves were shot.
The ride home was very silent. He was sad that he ruined the preview for all of us. So were we. I was sad that we, perhaps may never be able to do things like this as a family.
Later that night when we had all calmed down, I asked how we are going to handle things like this in the future. Would my son like to stay with grandma next time? He said no. He would just go as a bot. He would stay home, but send himself like Sheldon on the Big Bang Theory did.....Sheldonbot.....you need to watch the show.....Very very funny. And there you go. That is my son. He doesn't want to be left out. He doesn't want to miss anything, even if it is incredibly painful for him, and for us. Where does that leave us? Going to huge events with a kid in full melt down who is throwing himself on the floor and covering his ears? Someone is going to call CPS one day. I don't know why he wants to be there when it clearly causes him so much distress. This is for sure one of the many mysteries that is my son.