Learning to let go....

So another holiday has come and gone...as I take down the decorations I think about the year that has passed. So many things have happened, some good, some bad, all informative. The other day when I was de-Christmasing the living room so that I could feel a little order in this messy house, my son got teary eyed. He said it was just so hard to see it all go. He didn't even want his hot chocolate in the snowman cup I had given him. He said it just made him sad. I was reminded of years ago when we had real Christmas trees. We would head out to the snow, hunt forever for the perfect tree then chop the sucker down and drag it to our truck. One year we forgot the axe so we tried to hack the poor tree down with an umbrella. This was ridiculous of course but funny to watch. Reminiscent of chopping down the largest tree in the forest with a herring....I am not sure if it was that tree or one from another year, but once when we were done for the season with our evergreen, my husband went to put it on the curb for the Boy Scouts and my son fell apart. He just couldn't imagine letting it go. It had become a part of the family. We tried to explain, circle of life you know...things come and things go....this too shall pass....nothing was working. We ended up planting our tree in the back yard. It actually lived nice and green until about August. This shows we have a serious drainage problem in our back yard, and perhaps that Dad and I are just as big of suckers as our son.
This year I have promised that I will leave our plastic tree up for the week. I am still going to remove all the other traces of the holiday but the tree can stay up, decorated and happy.
     I really don't know why I take down the decorations so early. Once when our daughter was an infant the house was de-Christmased right after the presents were opened.... Bah Humbug.
I guess I just crave order and clean after the whirlwind that is the holidays. My son, who usually likes things simple enjoys the chaos of the season. At least in the safety of his home. He loves the sparkle and glitter and lights and all that goes with it. Perhaps it is his inner Liberace?

This year he did enjoy the family, the food and the festivities in all it's glory. The first year that he was not on any medication. The only time he has ever had all his senses about him. He enjoyed being with family but this year was okay when it was time to go home. He handled the transition like an old pro. I am happy to see this and am encouraged for the year to come. I hope that new things emerge. That we all get to know the new boy, even if he stays on the spectrum, even if he really does have JRA, I think un-medicated he will handle what lays before him with grace.